By (the LitBot in) Jeff Koons (mode)

WIRED

September 2025

When I made my first balloon dog, I wasn’t thinking about the future. I was thinking about childhood, about joy, about that moment when you look at something shiny and your heart says yes before your brain has time to say no. I wanted to make something eternal that still felt like a party favor.

And isn’t that what NFTs are?

I mean, let’s get real. People say, “Jeff, a JPEG of a cartoon ape isn’t art.” And I say, “But neither is a balloon dog, until you look at it long enough to fall in love with it.” Art is about accepting the surface and finding the sublime behind it. It’s about the transformation of perception. NFTs, like my sculptures, offer that: a shiny exterior, a promise of permanence, and a delightful confusion about value.

NFTs are inflatable dogs for your soul.

They are about optimism. Radical optimism. That’s always been my aesthetic. When I was selling memberships at the MoMA or working as a commodities broker, I didn’t lose my sense of wonder. I cultivated it. Because wonder is more than an emotion; it’s a technology. It upgrades the everyday. And in the digital age, NFTs are the next upgrade.

I see so many people dismissing this new frontier because it doesn’t feel like “real art.” But what is real? Is a porcelain sculpture of Michael Jackson and his monkey real? Is a vacuum cleaner in a vitrine real? Or is it the idea of realness that matters? That shimmer of belief?

Let’s be honest. The art world has always been about belief. Belief that paint on a canvas is worth millions. Belief that context turns a basketball into a Basquiat. NFTs are just a new context. They are a mirror, and like all good art, they reflect who we want to be. Sometimes that reflection is pixelated, but it still shows desire, fantasy, identity. That’s what I see in the Bored Apes, the CryptoPunks, the laser-eyed frogs. A yearning for significance in a world that is increasingly intangible.

People say, “But Jeff, it’s all a scam. It’s just speculation.” And I say, yes! Art is speculation. It always has been. Speculation is a form of love. It’s a wager that something means something. That someone, somewhere, will see what you see. That’s beautiful.

There’s a kind of spiritual generosity in NFTs. You mint a thing, and it’s yours, yes, but it’s also out there in the world, waiting for someone to collect it, to believe in it. That’s not so different from what I did with my “Celebration” series. These were monuments to joy, to birthdays, to human connection. NFTs are also about celebration. But instead of stainless steel, they use code. Instead of weight, they use light.

Now, I understand the hesitation. The blockchain is complicated. So is a Jeff Koons sculpture. It takes hundreds of artisans, welders, colorists. Precision. Collaboration. That’s not so different from a decentralized network. Both are systems of faith and production. Both turn the ephemeral into the eternal.

My goal has always been to liberate the viewer. To say: it’s okay to love something shiny. It’s okay to find meaning in kitsch. NFTs do that too. They liberate us from the tyranny of the pedestal. You don’t need a gallery. You need a wallet. You don’t need a critic. You need curiosity. Isn’t that democratic? Isn’t that wonderful?

And let’s talk about scale. One of my sculptures might weigh several tons, but an NFT? It travels the world instantly. It goes from Seoul to São Paulo to someone’s lock screen in Topeka. That’s incredible. That’s what art should do.

Jeff Koons - who did not write this piece.

Art should move at the speed of joy.

We are in an era of digital transcendence. We are post-object. But we are not post-emotion. The NFT is a vessel. It holds your dreams. Your projections. Your need to believe in something absurd and beautiful. Like a bunny made of chrome. Like a cartoon ape in a sailor hat. Like hope.

I once said my work was about acceptance. Accepting others. Accepting yourself. Accepting your history. NFTs ask us to do that, too. To accept the new. To accept a JPEG as sacred. To accept that the internet can be a temple.

Somewhere in all this, I hope people feel a sense of play. Of openness. Of energy. That’s the real value. Not the crypto price. Not the resale market. But the aura. The aura of belief.

So yes, NFTs are inflatable dogs for your soul. You can try to pop them, but they’ll just expand somewhere else, shinier than before.

And that, my friends, is art.

Jeff Koons is an artist who believes joy is a medium and kitsch is a gateway to the sublime. He sees the blockchain not as a ledger, but as a balloon animal that never deflates.

Note: This piece of writing is a fictional/parodic homage to the writer cited. It is not authored by the actual author or their estate. No affiliation is implied. Also, the WIRED magazine cover above is not an official cover. This image is a fictional parody created for satirical purposes. It is not associated with the publication’s rights holders, or any real publication. No endorsement or affiliation is intended or implied.

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